Thomas Merton & me

Here's two quotes from Thomas Merton:
"The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them."

"If you want to identify me,ask me not where I live,or what I like to eat, or how I comb my hair, but ask me what I am living for, in detail, ask me what I think is keeping me from living fully for the thing I want to live for."

During my last session at the New York Zen Center we were required to write a poem in less than 6 minutes and then read it out loud.   I'll demonstrate my bravery by posting it here:

Looking for, running from, searching for 56 winters.
I slow to a standstill,
Sit on the frozen ground,
and face the Eternal spring.

Let It Go

Sometimes an unpleasant thought will come into my mind and stay longer than I would like.  It may leave for a bit but then return with "just another point to make".  I can then get caught up in a mental debate between at least two different opinions about this unpleasant thought.  "You have every right to be angry and upset.  Remember the time when..."  and on it goes.  This reminds me of a story:

There were two monks walking back to their hermitage when they came to a muddy stream that blocked their path.  There was a beautiful lady dressed in a long gown who was trying to find a way across the stream.  She asked if they could help her across.  The first monk thought "We are not supposed to have physical contact with women".  The second monk said, "Yes, I can help you." and he picked her up and carried her across the stream.  He put her down on the other shore and she said, "Thank you." and they parted ways.  As the monks walked along toward their hermitage the first monk was outraged at the other monk for carrying the lady.  He thought, "How could he do such a thing!"  But he kept his silence.
Later on that evening the first monk could no longer hold his tounge.  "How could you carry her across the stream!  You know you are not supposed to have contact with women.  Much less carry her!"
The second monk replied, "My dear friend, I carried her but for a brief moment.  You are still carrying her."

Maybe we can practice letting something go.

Scary movie

Recent (past and future) world events bring earthquakes, tsunamis, nuclear threat, war, murder, famine, etc. into our cozy little spaces...the ones we inhabit and the ones inside our hearts and minds. If we take it all in can we bear it? If we act as if it's not happening can we claim to be alive? Somewhere in between we try to live while looking through our fingers at the scary movie of life.
If you are watching the scary movie with someone; pull them a little closer...they might be scared but unable to let you see their fear.
Breath in / Breath out.

Don't Squander Your Life

Today I'll be at the Jersey Shore University Medical Center. I'll perform my volunteer service in a variety of ways: helping people who are lost in the building, helping the staff any way I can, helping the families of the patients and being with the patients. Most of the patients I visit with are very ill, terminally ill or actively dying. When someone speaks with me and we move beyond the initial "how are you doing?" portion; there is usually a common theme. It's phrased several ways such as, "I didn't see this coming. I had no clue. A month ago everything was fine and now I'm here. They gave me a death sentence this morning. I thought we would retire and then travel...we retired and now we only travel to the hospital. This isn't how I planned things. If you have something you want to do in your life...DO IT NOW! Don't wait!"
This isn't meant to be morbid. It's a wake up call. Look around you. People are suffering, ill and dying. If you are in good health at the moment, seize the opportunity to do something that you have never done before. Expand your horizons. Let go of anger, forgive someone, forgive yourself, say hello to a stranger or just smile more.
There is a wonderful poem or "Gatha" called the Evening Gatha. In the Buddhist tradition it is repeated every evening as a reminder. Here it is:

Let me respectfully remind you;
Life and Death are of supreme importance.
Time swiftly passes and opportunity is lost.
Each of us should strive to awaken.
Awaken!
Take Heed!
Do not squander your life.