New Year

From the Dhammapada: Better to live in virtue and wisdom for one day than to live a hundred years with an evil and undisciplined mind. Better to live in goodness and wisdom for one day than to lead an ignorant and undisciplined life for a hundred years. Better to live in strength and wisdom for one day than to lead a weak and idle life for a hundred years. Better to live in freedom and wisdom for one day than to lead a conditioned life of bondage for a hundred years.
In most cultures there is a celebration that marks the coming of a new era. These celebrations may not all happen on the same date on our calendars but they are all the same in their intent. This New Year is an appropriate time to start fresh. Yes, I know the pundits (pundits are who is referred to when people say, "THEY said") tell us that New Years resolutions are doomed to fail. If that's the case then wait until January 2nd or 3rd if you must. Spend some time over the next few days and take an inventory of your life. It probably won't take more than a few minutes to get a short list of things that you would like to improve. Are they connected in some way? Is there a root cause? Is it based in fear?
Read the lines from the Dhammapada again. Okay, if you are freaked out by something called the Dhammapada, then pretend the words are coming as lines of your favorite song. Either way, give them some thought.
If you find that you are unhappy much of the time, resolve to discover the reason why and work to fix it. If you think you know the reason why and are not moving to fix it...reflect on your reasons for staying with your unhappiness. If you choose to not reflect at all...please check to see if you are accepting the conditioned life of bondage.
It seems that very little is learned if we continue to move through life on auto-pilot. Pull over occassionaly and walk around the vehicle...kick the tires...look under the hood...see if you want to continue traveling in the same manner. Maybe a new direction or new ride is in order...after all it's a New Year.

Tolerance

Practicing tolerance today. This means accepting people and events as they are...not judging, labeling or keeping score. Sometimes the lessons I learn are not pleasant but they are the lessons I will remember. There is always a lesson to be learned when your cage is being rattled...there you are...cruising through life...and then, "Hello! I'm your univited lesson. This is going to hurt a little or a lot...you decide!" If I can handle peeling off a layer of my ego (and keeping it off) I become a better person.
I've started a semi-structured training regimen for the upcoming Ironman in November. I know it's a long way off but it's a very long race. I've been swimming an hour on Monday, Wednesday & Friday and run for an hour on Tuesday, Thursday & Saturday. I'll soon incorporate some indoor cycling into the mix. My diet has cleaned up some from the Thanksgiving session. Too many carbs and sweets!
Have a guilt trip free Christmas! Give hugs to everyone in the room during your holiday gathering...this will get the conversation going.."What the hell is wrong with him? Oh, you know...he's practicing kindness or patience or tolerance...some of that new age stuff."
What a great opportunity to practice tolerance. Enjoy.

Days go by

Where did the time go? Just yesterday I was 18 years old and hitchhiking across Texas. My friends at that time were cowboys, hippies and crazed rednecks. Maybe I'll blog about that era someday. I'm guessing the statute of limitations will cover most of the legal issues. The rest of the topics are another story. Now I'm 56 and living on the East Coast. My current friends include Buddhist priests, yogis, surfers and triathletes.
When I look up into the sky the stars seem pretty much the same now as they were when I was 18. I'm sure some astronomers will (and should) diasagree but to the average guy (me) the stars seem the same. I'm pretty sure that people are the same too but my perspective has changed.
If you have a chance on a clear night, find a spot away from the artificial lights and step outside. Look up for a little bit. How long has it been since you have noticed the vast canopy surrounding our little marble in space? How long since you've taken more than a brief glance up as you hurry through your life? Can you comprehend how far away most of the stars are? Some of the starlight reaching us is coming from stars that are no longer in existence.
It's the same with some of the great souls who have graced this planet. Their bodies are gone but their light still shines for us. All we have to do is slow down and look toward the light. Just stand still in the light for a bit and marvel at the mystery of this life.

Matching Donations

This past Friday and Saturday I was at the Zendo in NYC for another round of contemplative care training. Some generous donor has decided to match all funds donated to the Zen Center between now and the end of January. He set a cap of $25,000. I'll be happy to let you know if this happens. If you want to have double the impact for your donation...now (or before February:) is the time. Click the "Donate" button near the bottom of this page and help crush the $25k limit.
One of the training exercises was working with "non-responsive" patients. Most of us assume that there is nothing going on if a person does not respond to our presence in a way that we can understand or expect. Google "The Diving Bell & the Butterfly". This might change your perception about what is going on under the surface for someone.
Practice meditation...any style...just begin...learn to see what's under your surface.

Perspective shifter

I did my volunteer shift today on the Oncology floor @ Jersey Shore University Medical Center. It was very busy and full of doctors, nurses and patients. Spoke with a lady who's lungs were filling with fluid. She had some fear and anxiety about drowning and dying. I talked to her about relaxation techniques and said I would teach them to her. She was very interested. When I came back she was asleep. Her husband said it was the first time she had slept in a few days. I guess just talking about relaxation can be relaxing. I talked with a man who was in for his second of possibly four rounds of chemo. He ran down the types of cancer he had been diagnosed with and surgeries he's had since 1989...I'll spare you the details. He was tough. He said, "This ain't no big deal. You feel bad for awhile..lose your appetite..then it comes around and you get better. I beat all of the others...I'll beat this one too." On to the next room:
A friendly fellow was speaking Italian and English as I came into his room. He was preparing to go home and was waiting on a transport service. He didn't have any legs and had lost the strength to pull himself around by his arms. He used to play tennis in tournaments and was very active. He apologized for crying as he talked about losing his ability to move himself around in the world. He said, "When you come down to this...all you have is your memories." I felt tearful too. I was asked to get a wheelchair to help a man downstairs so he could go on a daypass. I went to the room and met a big, biker looking dude with long brown, braided hair and tattoos covering both arms. He still had the ports taped into his arms but no tubing as he was going for a 3 hour outing. He had a walking cane that he used to punch the buttons on the elevator. When the door closed and it was just the two of us he said, "They gave me a death sentence this morning. Throat cancer." The door opened and I wheeled him outside and into the sun until his ride came.
When I got home this afternoon it was getting darker and colder. I decided to go for a run and I started out a little faster than normal. I watched as the sky shifted in colors and the sun began to drop. I fully enjoyed the ability to move my body. I appreciated the fact (and it is a fact) that everything is passing. Enjoy the moments as they pass.